at the end of the day, all we really have is ourselves. -ellen pompeo

in·teg·ri·ty/inˈteɡrədē/

1. the quality of being honest and having strong moral principles; moral uprightness.
2. the state of being whole and undivided

they say integrity

is doing the right thing

when no one is watching.

but what they don’t say

is how easy it is to lose

while everyone looks up to you

watching your every move.

integrity

is what you lose

when you’ve been pretending to be someone

you used to be

and no longer are

for the sake of everyone around you

who needs you to be who you were

so they can sleep at night

while your demons make you bleed.

i know the cracks on the floor of my shower

through blurry eyes

better than than i know

what makes me happy

because i don’t get to be the person i want to be

i’m too busy reminding everyone

of who they wish i still was

she asks me to tell her about myself

but it’s been so long

since i knew anything all at

i glance around at the faded broken pieces i am pretending to be

and don’t even know

if there’s anything worth telling.