the doubters are just dreamers with broken hearts. -atticus

by lina adams

the first time you realize

that your mother does not love you like she says she does

will be a demon more than a memory.

it will become harder to ignore her.

you’ll hear the malice hiding in the nagging comments she makes,

see all the moments she sets you up for failure,

start fearing her promises

-when you realize how broken they are.

the first time someone else tells you they love you

you won’t believe them.

your mother’s voice echoes too deeply in the depths of your soul

to let you believe anything good can still exist for you.

but they’ll tell you they love you again,

and as you tell them about your mother,

about her words,

they won’t run 

-though you were certain they would.

instead, they’ll hold you tighter,

and you won’t hear a broken promise when they say that they love you-

you’ll hear something whole.

they’ll have to say it a few more times.

you’ll keep thinking they’ll see too much of you,

that they’ll finally see who you really are deep down,

realize the things your mother always knew.

but they see it all,

and they stay.

there’s no love despite

or anyway–

just love.

one night,

you’ll forget how to sleep,

drowning in your mother’s echoes.

they’ll break you a little.

but maybe tonight…

choose the other voices-

you haven’t been loved like you should’ve.

i love you forever, and nothing will change that.

we are here with you.

we are here with you.

12 thoughts on “the doubters are just dreamers with broken hearts. -atticus”

  1. I wish I were an artist, so I could paint a picture of you surrounded by all the people who are here with you. We are many, and we are fierce.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  2. Believe me when I say: I love you. Llewelyn loves you. Gull loves you. Our whole class loves you. A million people love you. I want to give you a hug now so as soon as this is over I will come to your house and give you a hug

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  4. i love you in every alternate reality 🧡 thank you for writing your poems on the walls of my heart
    you make me feel less alone and more alive, and i’m desperately waiting for another chance to give you a hug 🧡

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  5. Okay, I don’t really know you in person so this might be awkward. But we’re gonna grit our teeth and bear it! Your writing is beautiful and I honestly have fallen in love with the kind of person who seem to be as a result of it. There is not a single doubt in my social anxiety ridden doubting everything mind that you are an incredible human being who deserves all the love and respect in the world. Sorry if that was weird. But yeah. You’re awesome. I mean it.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply